Facing the Past
by glisana2
Summary: When Dimitri left for Tasha, he broke Roses heart- but she managed to live her life still. But when she gets dragged to the source of her hidden pain by an oblivious Lissa, will Rose face the past or pretend to live a lie?
1. Chapter 1

"Ready to go, Rose?" my charge and best friend called from the other room. I sighed and grabbed my suitcase off of the bed. I was in for a long month. "Yeah," I called down to the living room. "I'm coming."

Thirty seconds later I was down the stairs of the large mansion we lived in and into the living room where Lissa and her husband, Christian waited by the door, suitcases in hand. I walked up behind Lissa and took the suitcase from her hand. She smiled back at me. "Don't worry, Rose. I've got this." She took her hand and held it to the large bump in her abdomen. I shook my head. "I won't want you hurting yourself. I can handle it. Where are the other bags?"

Lissa pointed out the door to the hedged driveway. "Ryan's taking the out to the car now. So were set to go whenever your ready." Ryan was Lissa's other guardian. A cute, twenty-something guy with curly brown hair and eyes so brown, they could be black. Truthfully,I had always been just a little attracted to him. So had lots of other girls. On his days off we can hear moans from his bedroom, but we all just ignore it.

I bit my lip. "I'm all ready," I told her. Lissa scrunched her eyebrows together, worried. "Are you sure you're fine Rose? You've been acting weird since I told you we're going to visit Tasha."

"Have I?" I asked, faking innocence. "Sorry, guess I'm just not used to new places." Lissa rolled her eyes, but let it go. "Okay, Rose. You know I'm here if you need to talk about anything, right?"

I opened my mouth to reply, but Christian interrupted me. "I have an idea," he said. "Let's cool it on the girl dramas and get on the road. It's a long drive."

"Oh cool it, Sparky," I tell him. "Don't get your panties in a knot." He made a face at me so I stuck my tongue out at him. Lissa patted her stomach. "I don't know if I'm ready for a _third_ child," she said to her baby bump. "Your daddy and Auntie Rose are almost too much for me to bare as it is." Christian and I roll our eyes. "Whatever Liss," I say. Then we exit the house. After the door closes, Christian turned around and locked it. "Well," He says to the house. "See ya again in a few weeks, old chap." Me and Lissa laugh then we all walk to the sleek, black SUV where Ryan, Lissa's other guardian sat in the driver's seat, both hands on the wheel. "Hurry up," he called through the open window as he honked the horn twice.

I shoved the suitcases in the back and climbed into the seat in the very back, so I could lie down and sleep on the long drive.

"When are we picking up Kyle?" I ask nobody in particular. "Were not," Ryan called back. "Tasha and Christian decided that four guardians are going to be enough."

I sat up. "Four?" Poking my head up and over the back seats, I saw Ryan nod, his curls bobbing. "Me, you, Belikov, and O'Brien." I squinted my eyes, confused. "Who's O'Brien?"

"The little ones guardian," he said. This only confused me further. "What little one?" Ryan sighed. "Really, Rose? Your best friend and charge is Tasha's niece in-law and you don't know this?"

"Cut the crap and tell me, Ryan." In the rear view I saw Ryan roll his eyes. "Tasha's kid." The words stung deep and buried themselves into my heart and brain. Tasha's kid? Does that mean Dimitri's kid too? Dimitri and Tasha's kid? Yuck. That thought made me want to wash my brain out. He's only been gone two years. Did he really get started that early when he got to her? After he left me...

_I answered the door to my dorm room. It was a week after the attack. In the outline of my doorway stood Dimitri, my 6'7 tanned and ripped mentor (slash) lover. His chin-length brown hair was tied back into a pony tail at the nape of his neck. His brown duster hung to the floor. _

"_Something wrong, Comrade?," I asked. It wasn't normal for him to come to my dorm for anything unless it was really important. He hesitated for a minute, shifting his weight to the other foot. "Rose...," he began. "I... I can't." In my brain I knew what he was talking about, but my heart needed confirmation. "What are you talking about?" Dimitri sighed and took a step towards, until he was a mere breath away. "I can't be with you. I've thought about it over and over again. I... I know what I said, but... I lied. I didn't mean to lie- but I did. I still love you, but it's too hard right now. I can't do __this to you or myself. I don't want to ruin either of our reputations. In a few years maybe we can be together... so people don't think things happened while you were still underage."_

"_But they did," I remind him. "I know... Just listen to me, Rose. I've accepted Tasha's offer. I'm going to be her guardian. It's too hard to be here with you." I clenched my teeth. "It didn't seem to hard to be here with me when we were in the cabin!" Dimitri closed his eyes and when he opened them I saw tears shining. "I love you, Rose. Don't forget that. We can't be together right now though."_

"_Maybe...," I told him. Though the statement about to come from my mouth tore me apart, I had to say it- just to see what he would say. "Maybe we just shouldn't be together. Ever." Dimitri looked down. "Okay."_

_I wanted to scream in outrage. He was willing to let me go just like that? No fight, no arguing, no... anything. Just okay! Well, that wasn't okay._

"_Well, fine then, Belokiv. I guess this is good bye." I had to fight to keep the tears from my eyes. I didn't want Dimitri to think I was weak or childish. Dimitri opened his mouth then hesitated. "Goodbye, Rose." At that, I turned my back to him and walked away._

I woke up in the back seat four hours later, with Lissa shaking me. "Get up, Rose! We're here." I sat up groggily. "At Tasha's?" Lissa nodded. "Uh huh." I looked around. Even the baggage was already out of the SUV. "I slept through the whole trip?" She nodded again.

I got out and looked around. It was a large, gray stone house on top of a hill. There were no other signs of people for at least miles. From the from the drive way all you could see in the distance were trees. The sun sat high in the sky, illuminating several of the stone chimneys coming out of the house.

"Wow," I said, in awe. "It's beautiful." Lissa smiled a bright smile. Somewhere along the road she had put her long, platinum hair up into a ponytail. "I know! I think I'm going to love it here! What about you? You'll even get to see Dimitri again. I know it made you pretty sad when he left to go guard Tasha." I nodded. "Yeah. Great." I gave her a fake smile. I always had been pretty good at lying.

I had never told Lissa about Dimitri and I. At first it hurt too bad and after the pain was replaced by a dull numbness, I was too afraid she's be angry at me for keeping this from her.

Lissa ushered me into the house. "Every one's waiting for you!," she said. As I walked through the front door, my breath was stolen from me. The house was amazing. The walls were stone and the floors were the kind of hardwood you would see in a cabin. Large bay windows let light shine into the room. In the middle of the room you could see up both stories and a huge skylight illuminated the room further, leaving no need for lights in the daytime. Against one The kitchen and living room were separated by a stone breakfast bar. The kitchen was filled with the newest appliances, all stainless steel.

I jumped as someone put their hand on my shoulder. Quickly, I turned around to see who was behind me. Tasha laughed. "Sorry to startle you," she said. I felt a blush spread across my cheeks. "It's fine," I told her quietly. Tasha had hardly aged since I last say her over two years ago. She looked extremely well for a thirty-three year old. Her black hair was loose around her face. The scar from her battle with striogi was still evident and gnarled her otherwise pretty face. Instead of ruining her face though, it seemed to enhance her beauty. It was a battle scar, showing her strength too.

Tasha spread her arms out. "So, what do you think of my humble home?"

"It's... wow." Tasha laughed and picked up one luggage bag in each hand. "Follow me. I'll show you guys to your rooms." She walked through a doorway on the right side of the kitchen, which led into a, long hallway lined with doors. At the end of the hallway was a black, cast iron staircase. Up the staircase was another small room with a archway. Outside the room was a wide, square room. The middle of the room was lined with a black railing overlooking the downstairs. There was eight doors upstairs total, excluding the stair archway. She walked to the first door. Engraved in the door was a tree. "Guardian Garret, this will be you room." Ryan looked at the door. "Thank you Lady Ozera. I appreciate it."

"My pleasure," Tasha said, flashing him a smile. "You can go ahead and get settled in while I show the others their room." Ryan nodded and walked into the room carrying his baggage. I tried to get a glimpse of the room but he blocked my view.

We walked to the next door. "That's the bathroom," Tasha told us. We all nodded then continued on. Next we came to a door with a bird engraved into it. "Lissa, Christian- this is your room." Tasha put the bags she was carrying into that room. "Thanks a ton, Tasha," Christian said, smiling. "It's no problem, really. I'm so excited to have you guys come stay. You'll get to meet your cousin too! I don't think you've ever seen Devon, have you?" Tasha was practically bouncing up and down in excitement. Christian just shook his head. "Nope. Were is he?"

Tasha tossed her hand. "He's spending the night with my friend Susan and her son. Alex and Devon get a long really well."

"I can't wait to meet him!" Lissa said. Tasha smiled. "And I can't wait to meet this little one," she said, looking at Lissa's stomach. "I'm going to be a great aunt!"

Lissa laughed. "Well, were going to go get our stuff put away. Well down in a little bit. Okay?"

"That's fine. Dinners served at six."

"Okay! Thanks Aunt Tasha," Christian called from inside the bedroom. After that the door was shut and me and Tasha walked on. We had to pass quite a few doors and before long we were on the other side of the large hole in the floor. "Where are my bags?" I ask her. Tasha pointed down. "They got left in the car so I sent Dimitri out to get them. He should be in soon. I don't know what's taken him so long." As if on cue the front door opened and Dimitri's large frame came into view. "Tasha!" he called.

"Up here!" she yelled back. Dimitri walked across the room and disappeared from my sight, but you could hear his feet on the stairs. Then, Dimitri appeared in the archway that separates the stairs from us. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a white tee-shirt. His hair had grown and was now almost to his Adam's Apple but his face was still the same. Handsomely angled and perfectly framing his coca brown eyes. Still pretty good looking. No, not just good looking. He was hot. The kind of hot that makes you stop in the middle of the road and get hit by traffic. Dimitri audibly caught his breath, but Tasha didn't seem to notice. "Hurry up, Dimka! The poor girl needs her stuff!" He continued over to us. "Rose. It's been a while." He looked down at me, eyes wide. I nodded. "Yes. Yes it has, Belikov."

"How have you been?" he asked. I gave the standard, "Good. You?"

"Very well." I gave him a fake smile. "That's good. Thank you for bringing me up my suitcase. I had better get settled in now."

"Tasha smiled. "Okay. Dinner's served at six. You guys have free reign of the house and yard, so do what you'd like and have fun."

"I will. Thanks a lot, Tasha." Then I went into the white door. Engraved in the door was a fish. I closed it behind me and looked around the room. It was like a hotel suite, complete with a mini fridge. The walls were stone and had a fire place filled with wood and above it was a large flat screen- probably 50". The floor was white carpeted and completely stain free. The back wall wasn't actually a wall, but rather an extremely large window that covered entire space where a wall _should _be. Outside I could see a large expanse of forest. Past the forest was a cliff hanging over a large body of water. The sun was on the verge of setting.

The bed was against the left wall and on either side was a wooden nightstand. In one corer of the room there was also a jacuzzi.

I ran to the bed and jumped on it. To my surprise I sunk right in. I rolled around I the bed for about five minutes, enjoying the soft and suppleness of the mattress and the satin sheets. "God! These people know how to live!" I shouted.

I got my stuff put away and glanced at the clock. It was only five-thirty. I plopped myself onto the couch, grabbed the remote, and began flipping through the channels. There was nothing good on. At all.

Sighing, I rose to my feet and left the room. I stopped outside my door for a second then went back in and got my iPod off the dresser where I left it. Then I went downstairs. On the back porch was a a round, black table. I sat in one of the chairs. After setting an alarm on my iPod for six, I put in the headphones and closed my eyes, allowing the music to take me. When I opened my eyes again Ryan was sitting in the chair across from me.

"What time is it?" I ask him as I sit up straight and pull the headphones out. Ryan looked down at his wrist. "Five forty-three."

"And how long have you been sitting there, watching me like your contemplating killing me?"

Ryan looked up at me and smiled. The dimples in his cheeks came out and made him look a lot cuter than usual. "You look better when you smile," I told him. He looked over me. "You always look good."

"Well, duh. I'm Rose- fucking- Hathaway. I'm naturally awesome." Ryan rolled his eyes. "You know Rose- we're off duty while we're here for the most part. Maybe, if your into it, we could, ya know, _hang out_ a little bit."

"I'll consider it."

"You should."

"I will."

"Good," he said, rising to his feet. "In the mean time, though, I can wow you with my gentleman charm." He held his hand out to me. I took it and rose. "For the last two years I've thought you somehow managed to evade my subucubus-like good looks and charm." Ryan shook his head. "Never, Hathaway. I just repressed my attraction until we got some time when we didn't have to spend all our energy on guarding Vasilisa."

"You remind me so much of Adrian all of the sudden," I said. He looked at me. "Well, that's not so bad. He's good looking, rich, and get's all the ladies."

"Yeah, but he's also crazy," I reminded him. Ryan shrugged. "The costs are nothing compared to the benefits."

"I guess..." Then we walked hand-in-hand (_jokingly)_ into the house and to the dining room. Lissa looked at me, eyebrows raised. I shook my head and smiled.

Dimitri- I noticed painfully- sat at the head of the table. To his right the seat was empty was pushed out and to his left was Christian. Next to Christian was Lissa. Tasha was absent for about a minute before she came in through the swinging door that lead to the kitchen. "Rose! Guardian Garret! Good, you guys are here. I'll bring out the dinner. Have a seat anywhere." Then she went back into the kitchen.

I sat at the other end of the table and Ryan took the seat left of me, next to the seat that was pushed out, Tasha came back out, carrying a large tray. On the tray was turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, and corn. The was also two large pitchers. One was clear and the other was white.

"This smells great, Aunt Tasha," Christian said, licking his lips. Tasha put the platter down in the middle of the table then sat in the seat next to Dimitri. I had to force myself not to look away.

"So, Rose," Tasha said, engaging conversation. "I saw you walk in with Guardian Garret. Is something going on there?" Dimitri almost choked on the drink he had just taken. "What!," I exclaimed. "No! Were both Lissa's guardians. That wouldn't be right"

"And you can just call me Ryan," Ryan interjected. Tasha laughed and nodded. Lissa and Christian looked at each other. Dimitri did nothing but wipe up the water he had spit out moments ago.

"Yes sir, Ryan," Tasha said. "And by the way- I don't think it would be so bad, you two dating. I know you both take your job very seriously from what Christian has told me. Also, Rose, I've heard you haven't even had a boyfriend since you graduated! Your too pretty to live a life like that. Just because you have a job doesn't mean you can't have a life."

I laughed. "Trust me Tasha, I plenty happy being single." That was a lie though. There was one man I'd even give up guarding Lissa for- and he was sitting right across form me. And at that moment he lifted his head up and looked right at me.


	2. Chapter 2

We stared into each others' eyes for a second. In his brown orbs there was... something. It wasn't really distinguishable. Sort of like a mix of emotions. Mine probably reflected his too, though. Anger, sadness, and a distant love all fought for dominance inside of me. I wanted to scream but that might have been a bit odd for the others at the table. Quickly I looked down at my food.

"That's not so bad of an idea though Tasha," Ryan said. I twisted my head over to look at him, mouth agape. "Are you serious," I asked him. He nodded, looking me in the eyes. It was as though we were the only ones in the room. "I don't see why not. Were off for the next month unless we all leave the house. The place has barriers around it. We both no that no guy is more important than Lissa to you anyways, so there's really no possibility of you not doing your job right because of me."

I, Rose Hathaway, was speechless, which apparently _is _possible, despite popular belief. I reached for my water and took a drink. I took as long as possible swallowing, carefully weighing my options. Nobody spoke- not even Tasha. (Yes- apparently that's possible too.) Finally, my mouth was void of water and there was nothing left for me to swallow. I turned to look at Lissa, tying to get a little input from her. On my eye's path over to her I caught a glimpse of Dimitri. He was staring straight at me. Then in my peripheral I saw him turn to Tasha, face expressionless.

Lissa nodded, smiling at me. "Come on, Rose. If it's my safety your worried about then forget it. I'm perfectly safe. I trust you wholeheartedly." Then she winked at me. "Besides, a good toss in the sheets could do you some good. You've been pretty grumpy." I felt my face flush. This was certainly _not_ appropriate dinner conversation. I turned back to Ryan. He gave me a cocky smile. "Ya, Rose. You could use a good toss in the sheets." I closed my eyes in an attempt to hide my embarrassment. A lot of thoughts flew through my head. Was this really happening? In front of Dimitri- of all people! Would Dimitri be mad if I said yes? Did I _want_ Dimitri to be mad if I said yes? Without really realizing it, I nodded, answering Ryan's question and my own. Yes, I wanted to be with Ryan, at least for a few minutes (if you catch my drift), and duh! Of course I wanted Dimitri to be mad. He left me and now it's my turn to get revenge.

"Really," Ryan asked, almost surprised. I nodded again, driving the final nail in the coffin. Ryan smiled. Lissa and Christian smiled. Tasha cheered. Some part of me wondered if she had an alternative motive to getting me and Ryan together. I wanted to dismiss that thought but something inside of me wouldn't let me. I noted the small glint in her eyes, but was unsure whether it was just happiness or something a bit more sinister. I tried my hardest to shake the thought away. _'You just want her to be the bad guy for stealing your man,'_ I told myself.

Dinner went without any other complications or surprises after that. When everyone was finished eating, Lissa and I cleared off the table.

"So... you and Ryan are going to date now?" she asked once we got into the kitchen. I looked around to see if we were alone. "I guess," I told her. "Not that I could really turn him down without getting 'Booed' out of the dining room." Lissa laughed and shook her head. "I would have understood, Rose," She put one hand on the counter. "I know your strange aversion to relationships. But I have to ask something." Her expression changed, turning into that of someone about to walk across a tightrope.

"What?" I ask her, giving her permission to continue. I picked up a plate from the sink to dry it off. Lissa took a deep breath. "This might sound strange, but..." She paused, lifted her hand from the counter and twirled her hair. "Um, is there something- and call me crazy for asking this- going on between you and Dimitri?" The question shocked me so much that I dropped the plate from my hand. It fell into the stainless steel sink and shattered. I turned away, evading the question and picking up the pieces of the broken plate from the sink. "Shit!" I yelled as I cut my finger on one of the sharp edges of glass. Blood instantly pooled inside the cut then dripped into the sink. I grabbed the towel I had been using to dry and wrapped it around my finger.

"Here," Lissa said, shifting towards me. "Let me help you." I shook my head and tried to tell her I was fine but she brushed off my protest and took my hand. A quick hot and cold sensation passed from her to me. The lights seemed to dim for a second, but I blinked and it was all gone save for a slight tingling sensation where my cut had been. "Are you okay, Rose?" She asked after she released my hand from her grasp. I nodded. "Ya, I'm fine. It was just a little cut. You didn't have to do that."

"I know," she said, "But I didn't want my guardian to be in pain." I rolled my eyes. "You seriously underestimate my pain tolerance," I tell her. Then I finish cleaning up the broken plate pieces and we go back to doing the dishes, making small talk. The subject of me and Dimitri completely forgotten. Potential problem evaded.

Once me and Lissa finished the dishes, I went out back to the patio. Ryan was there, as though he was waiting for me. Hell, he probably was. "Hey," he said, as I sat down in the chair beside him. Up in the sky, the stars were bright and the moon was full. "It's a beautiful night," I tell him, as my greeting. 'Hi' is too mainstream. Ryan nodded. "Sure is. Reminds me of the nights back home." I glanced over at him. His eyes had a far away glaze, as though he was remembering another place and time. "Where are you from," I ask. Glaze still in his eyes, he looked over at me. "Illinois," He replied. "Down south there's an academy- _Alexandria_- that's where I went during the school year. During the summer I'd come back home and help my parents on the farm."

"I never knew you were a country boy," I mused. "You don't have much of an accent." Ryan laughed. "When I came up to court to work they made fun of me a bit. I managed to adapt more to their way of talking, but I still slip of every now and then."

I sat back in my chair, not knowing what to say. The silence was an easy one and lasted a while. Ryan was the one who eventually ended it. "So... are we dating now?"

"That seems kind of like something from fifth grade, don't you think? '_Will you be my boyfriend?_'" Ryan rolled his eyes, but a smile played at his lips. "I'm serious, Rose. I really like you. I know this is all a little sudden, but you know what they say..." I looked over at him, waiting for him to finish. When it was obvious he wasn't going to I raised both of my eyebrows. (Since lifting only one was something I still had yet to master.) "No, I don't. What do they say?" Ryan broke into a wide smile. "YOLO."

I groaned. "Really, Ryan? I hate that so much. Especially when people use it to excuse really dumb stuff, like; 'I really should pay my bills, but I'd rather spend my money on this brand new car and go into debt. Oh well, YOLO!' or 'This guy looks really creepy and may kill me at some point in the night if I go home with him. YOLO!'"

Ryan burst into laughter. "But this isn't stupid. You're pretty and funny and make me happy. You have since we started working together. I want nothing more than to kiss you right now."

My head swam. A gust of wind blew and I took it as good sign. "Then do it," I whispered quietly. Ryan looked down at me, question in his eyes, as if to say "Are you sure?" I nodded and Ryan leaned in and kissed me.

Finally, the sparks I had been longing for two long years resurfaced. Sure, it was with a different person- but they still acted as a salve to a long time wound that refused to heal. The sparks and attraction seemed to mend the part of my heart that had been torn apart by Dimitri that night. I lifted my arms around Ryan's neck and leaned into the kiss.

I could have sat like that forever, but a loud slam made us jump and brake apart. "Oh! I'm sorry for interrupting you," said a cold male voice. The Russian accent sang loud and clear, as did the accusation. In the moonlight Dimitri seemed to tower even taller than usual. An urge to explain my self pushed inside of me, but I pushed it down, ignoring it. I had nothing to cover up. I was kissing my kinda boyfriend- and I like it!

"No problem. We were just leaving," I told him in a voice that was equally cool. Ryan's eyes shifted from side to side. "We were?," he asked.

"We were," I confirmed. Ryan nodded. "We were," he echoed. Dimitri just watched us, not saying another word. Me and Ryan rose to our feet and walked inside.

After the door closed Ryan turned to me. "Did I sense some hostility back there?" I shook my head. "No. It's just...," I racked my brain looking for a plausible excuse to explain what had happened outside. "Well, he used to be my mentor and he's always been kind of protective of me... and he never did take to kindly to me being with guys." The lie flowed from my mouth like water. I made sure I added just enough shy awkwardness to make it believable. Ryan seemed to believe it. "Oh, well then- these next few weeks might be a little awkward for you two."

I smiled. That was actually almost what I was looking forward to. Ryan took my hand. "Well," he said, "I think I'm going to head off to bed."

"Night," I replied. Ryan gave my hand a quick squeeze then went up the stairs and retired to his room. Not quite ready for bed, I sat down on the couch and stared at the fire burning in the fireplace. After a few minutes I went into the kitchen for a midnight snack. I opened the fridge and looked around for something quick and easy to satisfy the pang in my stomach. I grabbed a package of chicken lunch meat. When I closed the fridge a long shadow fell across me. Instinctively, I threw out my fist, aiming for a normal person's nose. Instead of the nose, however, it landed in the intruder's chest.

"Was that supposed to hurt?," asked an accented voice. I rolled my eyes, instantly recognizing it. "What do you want, Dimitri?"

He walked over to the far wall of the kitchen and flipped the light switch on. "Nothing. Is it all right that I just want to talk?" I shrugged my shoulders. Was it all right? Did I really want to hear about how he had fallen in love with Tasha and didn't need me anymore? Or maybe the exact opposite. Maybe he want's me again. But now I'm with Ryan.

I shook my head. "Honestly Dimitri, there's really nothing to talk about. You broke my heart. If your planning on apologizing you can go ahead and shove that right up your-"

"I'm not," He said, interrupting me. I blinked. "Er... what?" Dimitri took a step closer. "I'm not here to apologize." The dark intensity in his eyes scared me. It was something I had forgotten about him. "You hurt me just as much as I hurt you that night," he said. "I just wanted to wait. You're the one who gave up on us." His voice was full of accusation, but his tone remained hushed, as to not wake up the rest of the household. I was dumbfounded. How was I to respond to something like that? I stammered for a second, trying to collect my wits.

"I guess were both to blame in our own ways," He said in a measured tone when I didn't respond. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes. "You left for Tasha though."

"I left _to_ Tasha." Then he sighed. "I should have never expected a child like you to understand." The words stung deep and one look at his face told me he regretted it, but he didn't attempt to retract his words. "Well then! I guess that makes you a pedophile!" And with that I left the kitchen, packet of chicken in hand.

When Dimitri didn't follow me, I turned around and suck a glance at him. He stood in the kitchen, back to me. And in that second I wished more than anything in the world to know what was going on in his mind. What has he been thinking since I got here? For some reason, in the two years we've been apart he's changed. Or maybe I have. Either way- something between us had grown cold. Maybe he'd grown colder. His heart not reaching out for mine anymore. Or maybe I'd grown stronger and can now turn a blind eye to his love. Or maybe... somehow, what we had between us was gone. To that I shook my head. That wasn't true. At least not for me. There was defiantly still something simmering under the surface. Something that still longed for Dimitri's touch, for his kiss. That part of me would settle for Ryan's though. Besides, Dimitri had Tasha now. That thought pained me most of all.

I turned back around before he saw me staring. Then I went up to my room and laid in bed for what seemed like hours, willing myself into a sleep that didn't seem to want to come easily.

The sun's rays shining in through my window woke me from an dreamless sleep- well, that and an incessant knocking on my door. I sighed and got out of bed.

"Yes?," I asked as I answered the door. It was Ryan. "Are you coming down for breakfast?," he asked. He was shirtless but wore gray sleeping pants and his brown hair was tousled from sleep. His attire instantly made me aware of my looks. I ran a hand in my hair, trying the best I could to comb it our a little.

"Um, yeah," I said. "Just give me a minute."

"I'll wait," he said. I smiled and shut the door in his face before running over to the dresser. Upon looking into the mirror I realized my dark brown hair was sticking up in places and last night's make up was smudged all over my face. I licked my hand and ran it over the mascara marks trying to wash them off with saliva. Then I grabbed the brush from the dresser top and ran it through my hair a few times. Finally, when I figured I looked semi-acceptable I looked at my cloths. I was still wearing my jeans and white tank top from yesterday. I exchanged the shirt for a pink tank top. I shrugged, figuring it was good enough. Heck, Ryan wasn't even wearing a shirt.

I opened my bedroom door back up. Ryan was still standing there. "You look fab-u-lous!" I smiled and shook head at him. He took my hand and walked me downstairs.

Everybody was seated at the table in yesterday's seats. Tasha waved us in. "Come on guys! We've been waiting for you guys." Then she rose from her seat and went into the kitchen. On her way she passed Dimitri's chair and ran a hand across his chest. He looked back at her as she kept walking, face expressionless.

Ryan leaned in close to me. "PDA!" he whispered. I forced myself to laugh, though I really wanted to puke. Then we sat down at the table.

Tasha brought out the pancakes and syrup, along with various kinds of fruit juice. Boy, she was certainly Mrs. Wonder Wife. I stabbed the pancake with the fork with every bite I took- and I took a lot of bites. Everyone talked about little nothings, even Dimitri contributed a bit to the conversation.

After breakfast Christian walked up to me. "Can I talk to you," he asked. That surprised me a bit. Okay- a little bit more than a bit. I nodded. "Sure, Fire Crotch." Christian rolled his eyes and grabbed my shirt, pulling me off into the living room. "Somethings up with Aunt Tasha. Last night when I woke up she was standing outside your door. I watched her just stand there for like five minutes. Then she opened the door, looked around and walked down stairs." I scrunched my face, showing my confusion. Like seriously, what the Hell? Christian shrugged his shoulders. Then he reached up and brushed his black hair from his eyes. "It was really weird."

"What time was it?" I asked him, trying to figure out where I was when that happened. Christian's eyes rolled to the upper left as he tried to remember the time. Finally he looked back at me. "Like two in the morning." I thought for a second. By that time I would've been back in my room, asleep. "That's really strange... Did she come back upstairs?" Christian nodded. "After like another five minutes. Then she went back to her room and didn't come back out."

I just stared into space, trying my damnedest to figure out what Tasha had been doing. "And she only went into my room?" Christian nodded. "That I saw. She might have went into the other rooms first. It might just be nothing, Rosie. I just figured I should give you a heads up ya know, just in case." I nodded. Then Christian walked away. I still stood there, confused like an idiot.


End file.
